What Would Jesus Buy

Image courtesy of Morgan Spurlock Presents					What Would Jesus Buy?
When Tyler Durden met his fate at the end of Fight Club’s loaded gun back in 1999, I never thought anyone would have the audacity to resurrect him. Wrong. As it turns out, Tyler’s anti-consumerism message has once again returned to the celluloid world in the form of an evangelical preacher named Reverend Billy, who is determined to convince America to stop shopping in the latest documentary produced by Morgan Spurlock, What Would Jesus Buy?. CHANGEOVER. THE MOVIE GOES ON AND NO ONE HAS ANY IDEA. In 2004, director Rob Vanalkemade and his camera crew started following Reverend Billy and his Church of Stop Shopping across the country on their mission to save Christmas from the “Shopocalypse.” Joining Billy on his 6 week tour from New York to Los Angeles in a couple of bio-diesel buses is his gospel choir, the Not Buying It Band, helping him warn the American people about the evil of their prodigal shopping ways. ADVERTISING HAS US CHASING CARS AND CLOTHES, WORKING JOBS WE HATE SO WE CAN BUY SHIT WE DON’T NEED. Who is Reverend Billy? The good Reverend (AKA Bill Turen), was just another New Yorker disgusted how the retail industry had turned his neighborhood into a mall. But, instead of sitting idly by and watching the “Disneyfication” of New York City, Billy decided to take matters into his own hands. He dyed his hair blonde, bought a clergy collar to match his catering jacket, and started preaching to the masses. Reverend Billy’s mission is to teach us how to fight the false idols of Christmas spirit. WE’RE CONSUMERS. WE ARE BY-PRODUCTS OF A LIFESTYLE OBSESSION. MURDER, CRIME, POVERTY, THESE THINGS DON’T CONCERN US. WHAT CONCERNS US ARE CELEBRITY MAGAZINES, TELEVISION WITH 500 CHANNELS, AND SOME GUY’S NAME ON OUR UNDERWEAR.
Along the way, Billy and his followers encounter the typical lot of obsessed American consumers: the woman who buys a Louie Vuitton handbag for her Chihuahua who “needs” it, the teenage boy who thinks Christmas spirit means a new set of rims, and the girl who knowingly buys junk, afraid she’ll be ostracized by her friends if she doesn’t. THE THINGS YOU USED TO OWN, NOW OWN YOU.				Image courtesy of Morgan Spurlock Presents
Reverend Billy’s message is one we’ve all heard before. It’s just a message we choose not to heed, and the retail industry doesn’t want us to hear…especially at Christmas time. He just delivers it in a way that’s entertaining as well as educational. But, maybe that’s what we need. Maybe it’s going to take an over-the-top preacher and a gospel choir from the School of Stop Shopping to make us realize we’ve been reading the scripture and missing the message. IF YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU WANT … YOU END UP WITH A LOT YOU DON’T. Of course, his message for everyone to stop shopping has irritated a couple of retail chains in particular. In 2003, Reverend Billy became the only reverend to have a court order preventing him from entering any Starbucks in the state of California. Two years later, he was banned from every Disney property in the world. But then again, that’s what happens when you shout “Mickey Mouse is the anti-Christ” in the middle of a Disney store. WE ARE THE ALL-SINGING, ALL-DANCING CRAP OF THE WORLD. Obviously, evangelical preaching can be rather disruptive at times. But, Vanalkemade doesn’t leave Billy’s message buried in the comical antics of a soapbox preacher. In between Reverend Billy’s assorted spectacles of shopping confessionals, getting arrested, and car accidents, Vanalkemade addresses other important issues that play into our erroneous value system. Before long, you too will realize the shopping mall is only a symbol of everything that’s gone wrong with Christmas and that everything has become a commodity…even Christ. YOU’RE NOT YOUR JOB. YOU’RE NOT HOW MUCH MONEY YOU HAVE IN THE BANK. YOU’RE NOT THE CAR YOU DRIVE. YOU’RE NOT THE CONTENTS OF YOUR WALLET. YOU’RE NOT YOUR FUCKING KHAKIS.
Image courtesy of Morgan Spurlock Presents		In some countries, it is illegal to advertise to children under the age of 12. Yet, in the US, we spend $15 billion marketing to them alone. How frightening is it that advertisers’ main target demographics are children under the age of 8 who can’t tell the difference between advertising and entertainment? THAT OLD SAYING, “YOU ALWAYS HURT THE ONE YOU LOVE.” WELL, IT WORKS BOTH WAYS.
In America, with children today absorbing 40 hours of media exposure a week, while meaningful conversations with their parents total less than 40 minutes, it’s no wonder why we’ve become a nation of consumers. But, even more disturbing than the lack of communication between parent and child is the message that’s actually being sent. If parents keep spouting the Christmas philosophy of “I don’t care if I go broke…it’s for the kids.” How can we expect our kids to grow up to be financially responsible adults? WE USED TO SIT IN THE BATHROOM WITH PORNOGRAPHY. NOW WE SIT IN THE BATHROOM WITH IKEA CATALOGUES. Reverend Billy’s message goes even further than financial responsibility. He also tackles the globalization of our economy by exorcising the demons out of Wal-Mart home office, holding a funeral for small town America, and showing us how Main Street USA in Disneyland has become a ugly symbol of today’s society – empty, shuttered, and outsourced. It’s almost as bad as the commercial I saw on the Disney channel last week for a new updated Monopoly board game that has players swiping fake credit cards. A HOUSE FULL OF CONDIMENTS AND NO REAL FOOD. HOW EMBARRASSING. It shouldn’t take a psychologist or an evangelical preacher to tell us that we as a society are addicted to shopping, that buying is acquainted with love, or that happiness is just the next purchase away. Maybe Reverend Billy is right. Maybe we just need to buy half as much and give twice as much. Real gifts like time & love, not the latest gaming system. Corporations stole Christmas from us. Isn’t it time we take it back? I KNOW THIS BECAUSE TYLER KNOWS THIS. © Kelly Bartley 2007
Image courtesy of 20^th Century Fox			Image courtesy of Morgan Spurlock Presents

Running Time:	1 hour 30 minutes
Release Date:	November 16, 2007 (NY/LA), December 7, 2007 (limited)
MPAA Rating:	PG (thematic material, brief mild language)
Distributor:	Morgan Spurlock Presents
Genre:	Documentary